I'm coming, I'm coming...

Yes, there was a first day of school and yes, I do have lots of pictures and newsy stuff to post, but for now it's late and I'm still nursing a cold-ish thing (and I kinda feel like crap) so I'm going to go to bed now. Keep your pants on. Pictures of adorable children and lots of news coming shortly...

Don't shop at Walmart for school supplies the week before school starts.

Just trust me. Don't.

and now I'm home...

...and tired! Ten plus hours in the car today. We got Alyse all settled in, though, and had fun doing it. So mission accomplished.

I have a very busy week ahead. The boys all start school a week from tomorrow and we still have to get school supplies, get on our new schedule, visit both schools.... all exciting stuff, though, so not too much of a burden. And then there's the usual weekly phone calls, cleaning and errands. Tell you a little secret, though... I love it. I am so looking forward to working from home and being home this year. I love home (more than I love lamp). And especially THIS home. I think I like it more each time I come home to it.

(the word "home" was in the preceeding paragraph five times, in case you didn't count for yourself)

My husband did a brilliant job of holding down the fort and even supervised major cleaning detail Saturday morning. Yea Matt. So I get to sleep in my own bed tonight AND the house is clean. Wow. I feel like there's going to be a leprechaun on my porch in the morning or something.

Life is good. God is good.

Your thoughts?

I'm in Tennessee!

That's right folks. I up and took off for a warmer climate. My friend, Sue, drove her daughter, Alyse, down to Lee University today and I came along for some companionship and general amusement (I am rather amusing after all...)

It was a nice, long drive. The sadly ironic thing is, however, I am no where close to the family I have in Tennessee. But never fear, I am slated to see them next weekend around our Chain Reaction weekend in Hunstville, AL.

Tomorrow, we get Alyse moved into her dorm and get to see the campus in broad daylight. From what we saw this evening in the dark, it is quite beautiful. I caught a glimpse of a beautiful grand piano in the music building that I may try to sneak off and get my hands on. Matt and the boys are at home enjoying a quiet house with no company for the first time in almost a month.

I am thankful that I was at a point in my schedule where I could just take off and go for a few days. I realized that it is the first time I've ever taken a road trip with a couple of other girls and I'm rather enjoying myself. When I get back, we will be getting geared up for school, which starts on the 28th.

I'm sleepy. More later...

hooray...

Tonight, I won Dutch Blitz with my sister-in-law, Karen, and my nephew, Zak. This is very refreshing because I often come close to winning without actually winning. Feel me? But tonight I tasted sweet victory (while I tasted some fudge at the same time).

So does this change anything in the scheme of eternity? Not so much. It was just fun to win for once.

Cool, huh.

You seriously think you're bringing that mouthwash on the plane? Seriously?

OK. So I've been thinking about yesterday's crisis -- which did directly affect us, by the way. My friend Debbie flew out of BWI and she really thought through if she wanted to fly with all of the goings on. Long story short, she did and was not blown up by explosive toothpaste. That is a good thing.

But I was thinking about how much intelligence it must require to come up with liquids that you can safely bring on an airplane and then mix together to blow it up. I mean, seriously. My biggest question is why can't these brilliant minds spend their time doing something more productive? There are diseases to be cured, clean up from natural disasters that could still be done... come on. I wish I had that kind of a scientific mind so I could do something to benefit mankind instead of crafting ways to blow up Americans... which is a whole other issue in and of itself...

Friday, August 5, 2005

I wrote the following in my journal this morning:

A year ago today, my world came undone.

After a year, it still doesn't seem real.

I miss that beautiful, caring child more than I could ever put into words.

I've come to some conclusions, though, over the course of this past year. God owes us nothing. Every single day is a gift. If it's a good day, then it is a bonus. Even the ten years we had with Caleb - it was a gift. We didn't have to have any years at all, but we were graciously given ten -- a decade. And what a wonderful decade it was. To have a young man who has left behind such a legacy -- you can't make that happen. Only God can.

I won't be unrealisitc about this. My heart hurts like I never thought it could. Sometimes, in my head, I scream my questions at God. I see what my husband and son have had to experience and truly wonder why. I see my son without his partner and best friend re-learning how to live. I see two little boys whose memories of their big brother may someday be only something faint.

I know it's not fair but neither is God. He is just, though.

I got this as part of an email from my friend, Iris, yesterday:

"i was thinking about caleb today.

i was thinking about the fact that he was about my daughter's age when i met him.

even at that young age his loving qualities were very evident.

i remember how he was so giving and thoughtful even at that age...

when other children were still learning the concept of sharing... he just knew.

his sensitivity grew with every person he met.

in caleb's world, everyone's feelings mattered.

i love caleb.

and i just wanted to let you know that i was thinking about him.

he's just beautiful... and when someone's beautiful... their image is burned into your memory... it's locked away somewhere deep within the pocket in your heart."

Fortunately, today is a beautiful day. It feels like a day to be happy, so I will as much as possible. To those who have called, texted and emailed; if I don't get back to you, thank you. Thank you for remembering, praying for us, being in our life.


On another note, we have been very blessed with having folks in our home lately -- the biggest reason I wanted a bigger house with more rooms. I love having people over!! Matt's ministry partner, Jeremy, is here for a few days and we've enjoyed his company. My friend from way back, Debbie, is flying in on Monday. She and I share a lot of common interests; crocheting, sign language. She actually has experienced the loss of a child, too. Another thing, sadly, that binds us together. My parents and sister were here last weekend. They all helped out tremendously and we had a little fun in the midst of it, too.

I'm blessed to hear that there are people out there reading my blog. Please comment. It's not hard. You do have to sign up with blogger, but you don't necessarily have to blog.

My heart is really quite full of love for those dear friends and family out there. More happy blogging coming soon. I'm behind on some other thoughts I'd like to share, but... another day...

Hace calor

Oh my gosh, it is so freakin' hot! Today the temp is set to get up to 102, but, here's the good news -- it's going to FEEL like 113. A very unenthusiastic yippee.

We do not have central air in the house yet, so we have resigned ourselves to two window units in the basement and fans to spread it around (just like you, Melissa!). Now, the upstairs... we just avoid that all together. We've also discovered that the $3 movie theater provides a great respite for about two hours.

It's supposed to be down into to '80's by Saturday.

I'm so glad I'm not going to hell.

Cheers!

Fourteen years ago today, I married my best friend. We have had some pretty extreme highs and lows, but it has been so good. I am truly blessed.

We went downtown and ate at Philip's, rode in a little electric boat in the harbor, and got some dessert. We talked, laughed, even cried a little, and had a wonderful time. I am amazed that God put me with someone with whom I can spend so much time and still be crazy about him.

Like the song says, Matthew, you amaze me...



(this is us on Plumb Beach in Massachusetts during Chain Reaction twoish weeks ago)